Okay, technically they’re not ‘dead hookers’…

Oh man, this is simply too precious to be believed.  I know Jesus loves me, but this much?  You shouldn’t have!

Think Progress » ‘As Many as a Half a Dozen’ Members of Congress May Be Involved in Prostitution Scandal
‘As Many as a Half a Dozen’ Members of Congress May Be Involved in Prostitution Scandal Yesterday, the Wall Street Journal reported that the FBI is “investigating whether two contractors implicated in the bribery of former Rep. Randall ‘Duke’ Cunningham supplied him with prostitutes and free use of a limousine and hotel suites.” The Journal also said the investigators are exploring “whether any other members of Congress” are involved. Last night on MSNBC’s Scarborough Country, Dean Calbreath of the San Diego Union Tribune – which recently won a Pulitzer Prize for its coverage of the Cunningham case – said that “as many as a half a dozen” members of Congress could ultimately be implicated in the prostitution scandal.

The part I can’t wait for is where at the trials, the hookers — because they weren’t told the names of the GOP Congress-scum they were servicing — have to identify them through photos of what Monty Python would term "the naughty bits."

"Yes, your Honor, that’s him.  Called himself "Hank", but nobody else used that name.  I recognize the leftward bend, and the way the right one hangs a little lower than the other.  The clap is new though, and I swear it wasn’t me — I’m clean!"

A couple comments:  The title above is cribbed from an old saying, about how with some politicians they’re so powerful, the only way they can be brought down is to be found in bed with a dead hooker or a live boy.  Despite being an ardent feminist, I also happen to be in favor of legalized prostitution.  Just as long as there are strong measures to prevent exploitation.  Think "Inara" on Joss Whedon’s unfortunately defunct TV series "Firefly."

Secondly, even though a lot of the commentary so far in this case does not mention the party affilliation of the Congress members who could be caught in this sticky web of sex and whores, it bears mentioning that Duke Cunningham was GOP.  It is no leap of faith to presume that he’d invite only fellow GOP members to his little swing-parties.  Really — why would he invite even a single Democrat?

So we have a GOP sex scandal.

As Mr. Smithers would say, drumming his freakishly long fingers together, "Exxxx-cel-ent…"